Every year, billions of people around the world decide to change their lives on January 1st. They decide to lose weight, join the gym, pick up a hobby, improve relationships, switch careers, and the list goes on.
Then comes February…
Statistically, about 80-90% of people give up on their New Year’s resolutions, not because they are lazy (though some are), but because their goals are too vague or, in some cases, too big and too disconnected from what they can realistically do day to day.
If you really want to make a change in the new year, you have to be very specific and very realistic as to what you are actually capable of achieving. If you want to run a New York City marathon in November, you need to start running regularly now, assuming your schedule allows it. Without consistent training, you would likely struggle to make it even halfway through the race.
Yes, you are allowed to dream big, but you also need to systematically create small habits that will help you achieve your big goals. Simple, consistent steps in the right direction will actually get you to your desired outcome faster than diving headfirst into something you have never done before. You will overwhelm your nervous system, and your brain will eventually convince you to give up. To achieve success, you need to cooperate with your brain, not fight it.
You see, your brain is a machine that is designed to protect you from danger. Anything new that you introduce, your brain will perceive as a threat and naturally try to discourage you from doing it. When you decide to do something you have never done before, like a sudden, intense workout routine at the gym, your brain will signal danger. It is unfamiliar. That is why it often feels so hard to get yourself to work out. Intense workouts are not always good for our bodies, especially if you are a woman. You are putting your body intentionally through a lot of stress. This is why starting small is crucial. Let your brain get used to the habit. When something is a habit, your nervous system stops fighting it.
Allow your body to develop a natural desire to work out.
I do not want to discourage you from believing that the world is your oyster — it truly is. You can absolutely achieve what you set your mind to. That said, you need to be intentional about your dreams and goals.
So, here are a few practical tips to help ensure your 2026 New Year’s resolutions don’t fade away after a couple of months.
First, write down your goals on a piece of paper. This step is non-negotiable. Writing by hand does something typing doesn’t. It is scientifically proven that writing things down activates multiple parts of our brain. When you write things on a piece of paper, you are signaling to your brain that an action is needed. You are making a physical commitment to it.
Write it down and watch it happen.
Second, as I said earlier, make your goals painfully realistic. Be honest with yourself. If your lifestyle has never allowed for the gym five times a week, don’t start there. Make it one or two times. And remember, the gym isn’t the only option. If you are not a gym person like me (I genuinely detest them), you will quit sooner or later, while the membership fees keep quietly draining your bank account.
Go for long walks instead. Take a dance, pilates, or a barre class. Join a martial arts class. Try boxing. Do what you actually enjoy!
It’s also okay not to know which type of exercise you enjoy most yet. This is why you should try different things and see which one you love the most. Keep in mind, cardio workouts generally help with fat loss faster than strength training.
Setting realistic goals applies to everything. For instance, if you want to learn a new language, don’t buy an expensive course you will eventually forget about. Start with Duolingo for ten minutes a day. Watch movies in that language. Listen to music and learn the lyrics. This is actually how I learned to speak English. I studied it as a second language back home in Tajikistan, but the way I really learned to speak fluently was by practicing. I also had an incredible teacher who made us talk. On top of that, watching Friends and memorizing the lyrics to “I Want It That Way” by the Backstreet Boys definitely helped me nail an American accent.
Third, break down your big goal all the way down. Take that one goal and split it into multiple manageable mini goals. Write down what you need to do this quarter, month, this week, and today.
For example, with weight loss. If your goal is to lose 20 pounds, be realistic. A healthy loss is 1-2 pounds per week. So, that’s about 4-5 months. Now, break it down further. Write a weekly plan that fits your lifestyle to save time during the week. Don’t start eating salads on January 1st if you never eat them. What makes you think the new year will suddenly change your taste buds? If you eat a standard American diet, keep eating it, just slowly reduce the portion. Planning your daily menu is helpful. You can ask AI to help you do this. Tell chat your weight, height, lifestyle, and food preferences. Tell it how much weight you want to lose. Be specific, and it will give you a plan. The same system works for saving money, learning a new skill, or improving relationships. Start small. Make a plan and fit it into your daily schedule.
By the way, you can utilize AI for all of those things.
Now, this is the hardest part: staying consistent. The most important trick I learned from a coach is to put a strong, positive emotion behind your goal. Why do you “really” want this? Is it for a feeling or freedom? For pride? For security? What is it? That feeling is your fuel. A vague desire always fades because you are telling your brain that it is not that important. A goal connected to a powerful emotion sticks. Our logical minds set goals, but our emotional selves achieve them. The excitement behind achieving your dreams will pull you through the inevitable moments of resistance, which you will constantly experience. You are never going to feel like doing the right thing. Ever. Trick your brain by evoking the emotions you need to stick to your goals.
Lastly, throughout it all, you have to practice radical self-compassion. Be kind to yourself. Do not stress, do not beat yourself up if you miss a day. Do not think that you need to change overnight. No one cares about speed but you. This change is for you. Learn to love yourself enough to believe you deserve these good things. Work on your mindset, and your actions will follow.
I am rooting for you!
Now, go and write those goals down so they can start becoming real.
Fariza 